Humiliation and A Face to Face Meeting is Set

My task for Wednesday was more humiliating than I though it woul dbe and I did try to find a way out of having to complete it. Not to my surprise,however, much to my dismay....I was not able to wiggle my way out of the task and so I unhappily completed it.

The assignment involved walking around my house and finding different objects to pleasure myself with. Then I was to use them, orgasm and take photos. The only part that was changed was the orgasm,due to the fact that I have been placed on restriction from orgasms now and I am allowed one a week,but, must receive permission first.

At first glance the assignment seems to be doable,however, as I walked around looking for things I became embarassed at the thought of showing Sir what I would come up with and then showing Him via pictures how I enjoyed them. It was very humiliating while preparing for it and during the completion of the task. Once it was all said and done and I had sent the pics I did become aroused,but, I don't think I was turned on by the assignment as much as the fact the Sir forced me to do it even though I did not want to.

Another Assignment :)

Good Morning Sir,

 I am nothing more than a dirty whore that does nothing but pathetically crave the need to be fucked. Being the whore that I am I do not deserve the honor of being fucked or used by You or men like You, Your time would be wasted on this pathetically nasty slut and I am not worth the trouble of being considered as a usable fuck toy.

I am a disobedient bitch whose filthy cunt is always wet with the desire to be used and I would take any cock at any time.Llike a bitch in heat I would take any use that is offered to my pathetic pussy, however, because I am a such a worthless dirty whore  I am undeserving of any time or attention from You or any other man like You.

Wonton and desperate I would keep my legs apart and my filthy cunt available for any attention,but, i would receive none because I am an undeserving pathetic whore that has no right to even beg to be used by You. You would pass me by simply laughing at my  begging and pleading for just the least bit of sexual attention and You would see what a needy bitch I am. I am Filthy and undeserving of being a fucktoy for Your pleasure.

This was my task for today.....I had to write an email to my Sir and tell Him how much of a slut I am. I then had to call Him at His desk and read it out loud to Him. He had me repeat this sentence three times "I am a disobedient bitch whose filthy cunt is always wet with the desire to be used and I would take any cock at any time."

Tomorrow I am to go on a hunt for unusual and creative things to pleasure myself with. 

Tuesday's Task - Humiliation

Tuesday's are dedicated to my humiliation for His amusement. My place is to be whatever He wants or needs from me and that may sometimes mean degrading myself for Him.

I was ordered to wake up and insert my anal plug first thing. I was ordered to write upon my freshly shaved cunt the words "fuck toy".( I am beginning to enjoy labeling myself for Sir.) I did so and I was ordered to leave the house and run some errands for an hour,however, my R/L schedule did not permit me to leave the house as I had company visiting today. As I sat in my living room entertaining guests, I felt my plug enter my ass further and further. This kept my mind on how humiliating it was to sit in front of friends labeled, plugged and sexually controlled by another person. My secret and the fact that I had one that I only shared with one other person was incredibly arousing. When the hour was almost up I began feeling uncomfortable with the plug and I began to feel some pain. I was glad to remove it was time. While in the bathroom removing the plug I took a photo of my marked cunt and sent it to Sir as He had ordered me to do. Actually I took several pictures as I felt proud of myself for having completed my task. I have not heard back from Him yet and so I do not know if He is pleased, I can only hope that He is.

Monday's Task - To Serve

Monday's tasks are intended to teach me how to serve Sir. I am being taught that a submissive's job is to serve her Master/Sir and while being ready for Him sexually at all times, there are also other ways to please/serve Him. I was assigned a cleaning task that would take 40 minutes and I could choose which room to clean in my house.I chose my guest bathroom. On His orders I stripped naked and attached my nipple clamps. I began by cleaning the counters because once I began cleaning the floors on my hands and knees I was not allowed to stand up again until my task was completed. I cleaned the sink, counter and mirror and I honestly did begin to feel submissive. My RL was being pushed into the back of my mind and I began to focus on serving my Sir and doing it to His satisfaction. By the time I had completed the counter/sink and mirror I had entered His world in my mind. I lowered myself to my hands and knees and imagined Him standing behind me watching my every move to ensure that I was doing exactly as He had ordered.

I scrubbed the floor, the base of the tub and the toilet area. I thought of what I was doing, following Sir's orders to clean His bathroom while exposed and vulnerable in the nude. I was most certainly turned on at what I was doing. I cleaned the toilet to perfection and then the bathtub. Upon completion of my cleaning I was to lay on the floor, on my back and masturbate while knowing that I was the "filthiest thing in that room" since I had cleaned it so well. I did not have permission to cum and so I did not, however, I did sit on the edge of an orgasm for a short time.

I had given up my mind and body for those 40 minutes in service to Him and when I had come back to reality I was energized and very ready to send the pics I had taken and my report to Sir.

I have heard it said so many times that online tasks and assignments cannot possibly feel real and I MUST disagree. I leave my world of decision making and stress and enter His where I am a submissive woman and I love it there. There I am at peace and feel safe. Sir is local and so we will have a first meeting, however, even  if we did not my submission to Him would feel very real.

The Schedule- Thursday

My scheduled task for Thursday was to strip naked , get on my hands and knees and alternate rubbing my clit with spanking my ass, tits and pussy with a wooden spoon for no less than 15 minutes.

Pain has not really been something that I have experienced a lot of and being that it was going to have to be self induced, I was not sure how effective it was going to be or even how much I would enjoy or not enjoy pain.

I began and as I reached the edge of an orgasm I spanked my ass with that spoon and I must say I was thrilled with my response. I repeated this as I alternated where I was spanking myself and before I knew it I was dripping wet and wanting desperately to cum,however, it was not in my instructions to do so.

When i had finished my task I took pics for Sir and when I looked at them I saw that I had spanked myself fairly hard as my tits had marks and bruises on them and my ass was too sore to sit on for a bit.

Lesson learned? I enjoy pain! thoroughly. I am so excited that I have learned yet another thing associated with BDSM that i enjoy. Now i just need to find my tolerance level for pain. :)

A New Journey Begins.....

Change, change, change......I really do not adapt to change very well, especially when it comes to a "changing of the guard", so to speak. I was the student in school who hated it when her teacher was out and a substitute was present. I never felt as though the substitute teacher did things the same way and it bothered me. One of my quirks, I suppose.

Master is still away and we are still thinking that it may be December before He returns. In the meantime, He has agreed to allow a Dom, who is now my Sir, to have control of my orgasms and submission . The transition from one to the other has really not been as difficult as I thought it would be. Their philosophies about discipline and a submissive's place are the same although, I have noticed that Sir does not have the "Daddy" component in His personality as Master does. I am glad though,because it gives me an opportunity to be trained in a different manner which I believe will broaden my horizons. This transition is the easier of the two.

The second transition that I find myself faced with is the move from on-line to real life. Not as easy as becoming   acclimated to a new Sir. My Sir is local and my Master has said that it is a good thing and that He believes it would be very beneficial for me to meet with Sir eventually and have real life experiences. I know that He is right. When I first began my journey, I had to become comfortable within myself to type sexual things that I felt or wanted to say to another person and now I have no problem with typing anything really. Sir has had me speak with Him on the phone and just as I had to become used to typing, I am having to become used to actually saying the sexual words out loud to Him. It is almost like starting over. Although I was really nervous the first time Sir had me call Him,I am glad we spoke. I am becoming more comfortable and my first orgasm via the phone was amazing. I loved begging Him for release and hearing myself say what He was ordering me to say.

Sir has me on a daily schedule that consists of tasks that are intended to remind me of my place, to teach me how to serve Him and of course, to pleasure and amuse Him. Some of the tasks I have done before and some I am not happy about having to do, but, that is part of His pleasure......making me do things I do not want to do. Nothing on my schedule is beyond my capabilities or pushes any hard limits and so I must find a way to get them done for Him. I begin tomorrow and I hope that I will be able to please Him and make my Master very proud of me.

I will blog about the tasks as I complete them for the first time.

BT